They're certainly entitled to think that, and they're entitled to full respect for their opinions...
but before I can live with other folks I've got to live with myself. The one thing that doesn't
abide by majority rule is a person's conscience.
~Harper Lee, To Kill a Mockingbird, Chapter 11, spoken by the character Atticus
I read To Kill a Mockingbird for the first time in the 7th grade. At the time, I really did not see the point. Over the years, I’ve read that book several more times, and I can honestly say that I understand Atticus Finch. The message of doing what is right, no matter the consequences, is one that I have tried to absorb and live by. I’ve tried to make the right choices, even when those choices are not easy or popular. Often it is a hard road, and one that is not always beneficial to myself. But, in the morning, when I get out of bed, I can look at myself in the mirror.
So many times it seems that the right decision is the hard decision and the wrong decision winds up being the easy decision. How wonderful it would be if the right decision would always be the easy decision! Unfortunately, too many times in life, it doesn’t work out that way. Luckily for me, my father, who was a Marine who became an elementary school principal, was big on me learning several things. One of those things was that a person is only is as good as their word. If your word is no good, then you aren’t trustworthy. Another thing was that no matter what happened, you needed to be honest. Once again, what you say matters. A third element was that no matter what you do, you do it to the best of your ability. A fourth element was that you were responsible for your actions, and you wanted your actions to be honorable. Finally, it didn’t matter what others were doing, you had to make decisions based what you believed to be right. I know, it sounds somewhat old-school, but you know what? Those lessons have served me well through the years.
You see, Atticus lives by similar beliefs. He does what is right because it is right, and not for any other reason. He is the epitome of the good and honorable man. He may not be filthy rich, and may never be famous, but more importantly, he is a good an honorable man. And, he imparts these same virtues to his children. He passes those lessons on to his offspring so that they, too, can live honest, honorable lives. Maybe there is a reason I keep coming back to that book.
As a parent, I’ve tried to pass these values on to our son. I think he gets them. He is honest, he thinks about how is actions impacts others, he tries to keep his word. I’m happy with what I’m seeing. He is still young. And yes, 19 is still young. But I think I see the makings of someone that you would call a ‘good man’. At the bottom line, that is all I can ask of him. In the long run, that will help him make his way in the world and help him be able to look at himself in the mirror.
What about you? Are you teaching your children these kinds of lessons? Are you doing what you can to teach your child to be a ‘good man’ or ‘good woman’ in the future? Think about it. If you are not, maybe you need to think about what it can mean for your child’s future. Go on, give it a thought. In the long run, it might really be worth it.
Indoors, when Miss Maudie wanted to say something lengthy she spread her fingers on her knees and settled her bridgework. This she did, and we waited.
“I simply want to tell you that there are some men in this world who were born to do our unpleasant jobs for us. Your father’s one of them.”
“Oh,” said Jem. “Well.”
“Don’t you oh well me, sir,” Miss Maudie replied, recognizing Jem’s fatalistic noises, “you are not old enough to appreciate what I said.”
~Harper Lee, To Kill a Mockingbird
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