Family Vacation Planning - What to Think About

Many of you who know me, or who have read our OSBD newsletter know that I’m a big believer that all children benefit from going places and doing things.  Bottom line, all children should get outside the classroom and outside the home to go do things, experience things, see things and touch things.  It gives kids the ability to put a better reference on their world while opening them up to new interests and opportunities.  I truly believe that getting kids out in the world helps them learn and make those connections that will help them as they grow.  I especially believe that this applies to children with disabilities.

We have always traveled whenever we have had he opportunity.  When Ian was born, as I’m sure you remember, had a few medical issues.  When they had either resolved or stabilized during his first year, we made the decision that he was going to have the opportunity to travel and see as many things as we could arrange.  Both my wife and I had grown up in families where we went on family vacations, and wanted to continue that as well with our son. 

Ian’s first vacation was when he was 13 months old, and he will be 20 in a few months.  Needless to say, travelling has become a part of his life.  Part of our life over the years has been how to plan a vacation that will be fun, stress-free (or at least as low stress as possible), and allow us to see, do, and learn.   With that in mind, what follows are some things we’ve learned that make our trips easier that hopefully you can use in planning your trips.

First, you can go pretty much anywhere you want with enough preplanning.  If you don’t wait until the last minute, and you do your research, you can pretty much figure out how to make most activities work.  Also, by starting your planning early, you can contact airlines, hotels, theme parks, tour operators, and just about any group that you might be interested in using.  Did you know for instance that many cruise lines, including Disney, offer American Sign Language Interpreters on some cruises?  Or that Disney has a schedule for interpreted shows at the theme parks?  They do, but you have to do your research to find out when. 

Flying also presents some special considerations.  Ian just flew by himself to visit grandparents in Virginia.  When he made his reservations, he made sure to let the airline know that he is deaf and has cerebral palsy.  That is helpful to both Ian and to the airline.  The airline is able to make sure that their gate staff and aircrew know that they have a passenger that (in Ian’s case) cannot hear announcements, and may need a little bit of help getting his backpack into the overhead bin.  For Ian, he knows someone will be sure tell him when it is time to board and has piece of mind that there won’t be any untoward surprises during the process.

Second, in planning your activities, don’t over schedule.  This seems to be a somewhat American phenomenon.  The vacation as an endurance event….  Don’t do it!!!  One of the worst things you can do on vacation, especially when travelling with a child who has special needs, is to build so tight a schedule that everyone winds up tired and fussy, and on everyone’s nerves.  When Ian was younger, we used to build an initial schedule, then take out about 1/3 of the things that we had on it, and build in a ‘rest’ day every 3^rd or 4^th day.  Sure, we didn’t get to everything, but all those things we did get to were a whole lot more enjoyable for everyone. 

Third, keep your plans while on the trip flexible.  We make a point to keep our trip schedules so they can adjust to how everyone is feeling, weather, and other considerations.   Very few things were cut in stone and unchangeable.  Remember, the idea of a vacation is fun and relaxation for everyone.  Watching some folks on vacation, the old joke about the captain who tells his crew that the whippings will continue until morale improves comes to mind.  Don’t be that captain!

Fourth, whenever possible, involve the whole family in planning.   What do they want to do?  What do you want to do? What does your spouse want to do?  Try and make sure everyone gets a little bit of something.  That way it becomes everyone’s trip.  Also, it teaches everyone a bit of giving to the group and understanding things aren’t only about them.   

Finally, remember to try and have an idea on how to diffuse issues that may arise.  The younger the child, the more possibility things will pop up.  I remember the first time we went to London.  I was not going to miss two things; Westminster Abbey and the tombs of so many of the English kings and queens, and the Tower of London.  Not places a 9 year old would have a huge interest in seeing.  My wife had seen Westminster when she was in college.  So we planned a ‘rest’ morning and I went there by myself while Ian slept until about 11:00 that morning.  Then he was ready to go to the British Museum and see the mummies that afternoon. 

When it came to the Tower of London a few days later, Ian was a bit tired and grumpy when we got there.  Things were not horrible, but not particularly great.  Until we got to Tower Green and the small church where I took the time to explain this was where they beheaded folks who the king was not happy with, and that under the floor of the church were some of those dead people.  Ian’s response; “We are walking on dead people?”  Suddenly the tower became a whole lot more interesting for him.  It wasn’t kings and queens and a large part of the core of English history, but dead people underfoot.  Whatever it took, it worked. 

So, you can make travel work.  Think it through, plan, be flexible, and make it fun for everyone.  You will learn much, and so will your child.